Admit It! It Sucks! (Secret Wexler Photo Update)
Jay Wexler started it at PrawfsBlawg. It being all curmudgeonly, I couldn't resist.
Fans of Joe Queenan will recall a series of articles he wrote for Spy Magazine in the early 90s called "Admit it! It Sucks!" in which he skewered various things—jazz, "San Francisco"—that all good serious cultured intellectuals are supposed to say they love but that, if they were honest with themselves, would admit actually suck.
As ridiculous as it seems, this is definitely worth a meme. List three things that everybody says they love but really, if truth be told, suck. Then pass it along to three blawgers who you either love or hate, according to how you feel about memes.
Here goes.
Sushi. It's raw fish, for God's sake! It's what you would step over so as not to get it on your shoe. And people not only eat it, but pay to eat it. If I was trying to torture someone, I'd give sushi serious consideration. It sucks.
Pinot Grigio. It tastes like petroleum detritus. But if enough people say a wine tastes good, all the people who can't tell the difference will agree. Whoever started people on drinking Pinot Grigio must be laughing awfully hard.
Soccer. The perfect game for people who think baseball is too exciting.
I wonder what Bennett, Gideon and Tannebaum will have to say? Of course, Tannebaum may not be familiar with things cultured intellectuals are supposed to say they love. We'll see.
Update: Hidden camera photograph of Jay Wexler happily eating giant killer asparagus after cricket match. Crystal stemware glass filled to the brim with Pinot Grigio not pictured.
I never knew there were articles about this concept, but it is something I often rant about - that people say they like something because they think they are supposed to:
1. The Movie "Pulp Fiction."
Not a single person understands what that movie is about - Dancing? Shot in the Heart? Guns? No one liked that movie either, they just say they loved it because its seemingly some cultural piece of film.
2. Pellegrino
Sounds nice, brings everyone into a countryclub type atmosphere. No one ever orders Pellegrino, they wont "take" a Pellegrino, they'll "have" "a" Pellegrino. Tastes like crap.
3. Asparagus
It's fine, it sounds intelligent to have it at a steak house. You don't love it, it's ok.
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Cricket the perfect game for people who find golf is too exciting
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I went to a cricket match once. The only part I like was when the brought the drink cart onto the field and everyone stopped to have a spot of gin. I can't really say for sure that it was gin, but I prefer to believe it. If I'm wrong, please keep it to yourself.
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Mothers, children and apple pie?
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I like pie.
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brian,
I totally agree with you re. Pulp Fiction. I walked out after 15 minutes to the incomprehension of wife and friends. Never had I seen such stupid violence- and profanity-laced footage devoid of any meaning.
But what's wrong with Pellegrino (or Gerolsteiner or Perrier)? It's mineral water, way better than that chlorine stuff coming out of many taps.
As a European I must say your judgement sounds like a cultural issue. Just not any American mineral water around.
Now about asparagus. Have you ever had the fresh, plump, white Schwetzinger asparagus with translucent slices of smoked ham, air-dried Bündner Fleisch, the three super cholesterol sauces, Hollandaise, Bearnaise and Choron served with new potatoes and a dry white wine?
All that in a garden restaurant at the foot of the Heidelberg Castle on a warm evening in May, the air fragrant with Spring. Makes me homesick to think about it.
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Martin, I take back everything I said about asparagus. You are right, it's the greatest thing in the world. I apologize.
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I like asparagus.
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ny yankees, castro, hybrid cars
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Newspapers and theater. Salad.
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I like salad.
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And the verdict is - there's no accountin' for people's tastes.
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Not at all, Brian. I have to thank you for presenting the opportunity. I had been looking far and wide to get a chance to voice the memory. Happens every year when spring comes around. :}
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Basketball. All they do is score and score and score. Yawn.
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1. Fresh-squeezed orange juice (I don't understand why they think they're doing anyone a favor by leaving the pulp in)
2. Massages at spas at 5-star hotels (too ticklish)
3. Window seats on airplanes (prefer to try and forget I'm actually on a plane...)
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Well Sheila, aren't we the fancy pants with your massages at 5 star hotels. Hey. Wait a second. Isn't the Fairmont a 5 star hotel? Yeah, that's the ticket. Oh Sheila, I just thought of something else I need...
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You're so mean! You have no sense of humor!
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Who are you angry at Gid? I know it's not me, since I have one of the most finely honed senses of humor in the whole blawgosphere (for a curmudgeon, of course).
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He might be after me.
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