A Feel Copped

At 6:14, a TSA drudge makes  Maria Muldaur’s prediction come to life. 



Via Huff Post, Ashley Jessica, a 27-year-old Ph.D student from Toronto, didn’t go to the San Diego Airport looking for a good time.


About halfway into the procedure, a TSA agent feels the area between Jessica’s breasts, and Jessica puts up her hands as if to protect herself from further touching.


Less than two minutes later, the agent appears to run her hands all the way up the inside of Jessica’s leg. Jessica pulls away and becomes visibly uncomfortable.


“OK, you need to hold still for this process,” says another TSA agent, who is off-screen.


“She just touched my vagina!” Jessica replies. “Seriously! That was not my upper thigh.” (Jessica eventually submitted to the pat-down and was cleared to fly to Toronto.)

But it’s all good, because the TSA explains:


In review of the closed-circuit video, it is abundantly clear that the two TSA officers conducting the pat-down carried out their responsibilities in a professional and polite manner and according to procedure, offering the passengers the opportunity to have the pat-down conducted in a private setting and taking time to explain each step along the way.
So if you want to touch random women’s body parts (and I refuse to be drawn into the “vagina is an internal canal and not on the surface” debate again), put on a blue shirt, behave in a “professional and polite manner,” and offer to do it in a private setting.  So says the government.  Unless you’re a college student, where even thinking about touching of any body part would be intolerable.

8 comments on “A Feel Copped

  1. John Burgess

    All those guys who get railroaded out of college? No fear… they can get jobs at TSA.

    See? Their lives aren’t “ruined”, they’re just shunted onto another track. All is good.

  2. SHG

    And all the unproven allegations of collegiate sexual misconduct fixed! Of course, that might leave us with only neutered males with college degrees and overly aggressive TSA agents. Oh wait.

  3. Jordan Rushie

    What scares me most about this, is that my generation, and generations to come, are going to think this kind of thing is okay in a free society.

    “Oh, don’t worry. It’s the government. They’re allowed to do whatever they want! Terrorism or something. Just let the nice man in the blue shirt fondle your breasts for a few minutes and stop whining. Otherwise someone might fly a plane into something.”

  4. SHG

    That’s horse has left the barn, Jordan. It’s not like they “like” it, but they’ve been weaned on safety first, and they will not utter a peep as this is just how the world is. Grin and bear it.

  5. BL1Y

    It’s entirely plausible that young and future generations will be more opposed to these problems, not less.

    When the TSA and DHS and all these other things are created by politicians you voted for and continue to vote for, and by a system you’ve long supported, it’s very hard to strongly oppose them because doing so means accepting that you screwed up, that you helped facilitate the erosion of our rights, and that you’re part of the problem. It’s easier on your psyche to downplay the problems — that it’s just a little longer wait at the airport, that you won’t be the one to get your genitals groped, that for all the bad stuff you let happen on your watch the next generation is going to be make it even worse.

    Kids though, they haven’t bought in to the system yet, they have the greatest potential to be the ones to oppose the new status quo.

  6. SHG

    Acid trip flashback? Much as boomers are to blame for all the misery the slackoisie suffers, this one is a serious stretch. And yet, your “greatest potential” argument is blind leap, considering milliennials would have to get off the couch and put down the Cheetos.

  7. BL1Y

    I wasn’t talking about who is to blame, but rather who is most willing to change the new status quo.

    Which of the people involved in the video has worked on the Opt Out campaign to protest and raise awareness about TSA abuses, the 27 year old or her mom?

  8. SHG

    A sample size of 2, and we don’t know for sure whether the mom does? Well, okay then. Highly persuasive.

    On the other hand, there’s a blawger or two of the boomer persuasion who have had something to say about the bad things being done by the TSA and DHS. But they don’t count because they’re old and incredibly uncool.

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