Debate: It’s Time For A National Divorce

Ed. Note: Another debate has broken out at SJ! Fault Lines alumni Mario Machado and Christopher Seaton are ready to slug it out to the following question: “Resolved: It is in the best interests of the American public to pursue a “national divorce.” Chris will take the affirmative while Mario argues the negative. Chris’ argument follows, and you can read Mario’s here.

Abraham Lincoln warned us back in 1858, “A house divided cannot stand.” One hundred and sixty-three years later and we still haven’t wised up to what he really meant.

Our national division’s brewed for some time. If one wanted to put a pin at the precise moment in history where the country fractured, an argument can be made for the moment Hillary Clinton declared half of us “a basket of deplorables.”

Since then our national divide has only grown. Americans generally agree their neighbors are either intolerant bigots or oppressive wokescolds. In the last year, our isolation only polarized us further as lockdowns left us more time to leave hot takes on social media.

The American Experiment has failed. It’s time for a national “conscious uncoupling.”

How would such a divide work? I pose we’re seeing it happen in real time thanks to COVID. Every day I see more license plates from states like Pennsylvania, New York, and Michigan in my state. Americans are voting with their feet, and the evidence points to a clear divide between the “liberated” and “lockdown” states.

So let’s make this America Red and America Blue. I’m not necessarily saying this divorce should be along political party lines. This is hypothetical. Before anyone starts in, this is a DEBATE. We’re allowed thought experiments.

Theoretically, once legislation passed, I propose Americans have three months to decide in which country they want to live. That should give everyone enough time to make arrangements and sort their situations out.

Plus this is America. If we pull a Brexit, we can do so efficiently.

Once the split ends our union, you’ll be a citizen of America Red or Blue, and live your lives to the laws of that country. Travel between Red and Blue states theoretically would require passports or some form of similar document.

Yes, this is a drastic measure. It’s time to try something different.

I don’t just view this as another logical exercise. I think this is best for the people of this once great nation.

If you really believe you’re surrounded by fascists or racists of any sort, then you should want to move to a place where there aren’t any. If the laws of a nation aren’t ones you’re willing to follow, you should go someplace that suits your view of liberty.

Once we’re split, it’s going to be as amicable as everyone wants to be. I suspect we can conduct trade and play with everyone nicely.

As long as we conduct ourselves like adults, there’s no reason at all this could go wrong.
Once the split ends, people would feel free to speak, act and behave as they chose. No one would worry about judgmental behavior from an “out group” since we’d theoretically lack them in our new nation-states.

We’d also have arguably less crime because voluntarily agreeing to live under the laws of a new nation means one would be more inclined to follow the law.

One argument often made against such split is that what we currently refer to as “red” and “blue” states receive a disproportionate amount of federal aid. The idea is that if we split, the “blue” states would supposedly get a better deal.

It’s absurd because we haven’t even started the discussions of who’s going to get what. We’re splitting a country here. No one said it would be easy. We can get the lawyers and mediators to figure it out. I hear quite a few are good.

But if I’m uncomfortable with your stance on a bathroom bill and my opposition is “literally violence,” then we’re done. I have no common ground with you. I’d rather spend my time with people who don’t want to rob me of my ability to put food on my children’s plates. You and I literally have no reason for us to be citizens anymore.

Look, ladies and gentlemen, I know I’ve become a bit of a humorist around here these days but no one can deny how ridiculous our lives became until we take a closer look.

Some places jailed ministers for holding church services. Your personal feelings on how much a virus spreads means nothing to me if you think it’s okay to jail a man of faith tending to his flock. Especially in a time of crisis.

So long, my former fellow Americans. I’ll see you once the judge signs the papers.

And let’s not think about getting into trouble once we split. I don’t think you’ll try.

I’ll be on the side with the guns.

11 thoughts on “Debate: It’s Time For A National Divorce

  1. MIKE GUENTHER

    Watch out for those movers from PA, NY and MI. They vote and soon enough, you’ll here such phrases as ” That’s not how we did it back home” and “There ought to be a law.”

    Next thing you know, you’ll have a Cuomo type Governor and AOC type Congress Critters.

    But seriously though. What would happen to the military bases? The progressive coasts have the sub bases and naval ports while the conservative middle has all the ICBM’s and a lot of the Army and Air Force bases. Will there be some kind of mutual support treaty or do the two different entities split it down the middle?

    What about natural resources? They’re all in the conservative middle while all the biggest ports are on the progressive coasts. How would you reconcile all that?

    Some states would be easier to “immigrate from than others for many reasons. On the west coast, for example, the majority of citizens east of the Pacific Coastal Mtn Range are mostly sane, middle of the road folks, while most of the folks on the coast from San Diego to Seattle, are bat shit crazy. The same could be said for the eastern seaboard, also, at least from NY down to middle NC.

    I just think we need to think long and hard before making such a momentous decision and throwing the country into complete chaos.

    1. CLS

      Interesting point. Let’s extend the hypothetical to where when you make the move you agree to can the “That’s not how it went back home ” bullshit since you’re voluntarily moving to the country of your choice.

      As far as the military goes, I think you just made the argument why we’d get along civilly. The threat of mutually assured destruction means we don’t turn on each other and watch our collective backs.

      Dividing resources is part of what we have to do as part of the split. Maybe more go to one country than the other. Maybe we have to come up with a reason to trade goods for resources. It’s negotiation.

      We’ve been thinking about this for a while, Mike. I say it’s time to take the plunge and make it official.

  2. Guitardave

    Gee, think of all the pension/SS commitments that will not have to be paid to folks in the ‘other’ country.
    Are ‘faith based’ social services gonna cover those billion$? I’m afraid the working young-uns are gonna have to do a little better than 10% in the offering plate each week.
    Then again, you could save some bucks if you just throw up a unabomber style shack out back for your demented Grandpa and crippled Grandma, amirite?

    1. CLS

      I think we’d actually see a net increase in the social safety nets of both countries.

      The split means both countries can figure out how to reduce entitlement programs on their own. If it’s through private donations, so be it. Government programs? Okay.

      But each would have the autonomy to figure their own shit out.

      1. SHG

        A fractured body politic doesn’t mean the logistics of disentanglement are going to be easy. But that’s a secondary question, like what to do about the children, as in any divorce.

  3. Drew S.

    As I say to my liberal friends when they bring this up — get over yourself. Politics is fluid. A Republican from 1860 looks nothing like a Republican from 1960 and they will look nothing like a Republican in 2060 — not to mention that individuals’ political views generally change over their lifetime. Would you expect a red American to emigrate to blue America if they find themselves becoming more liberal in old age? Would future red and blue Americans be expected to emigrate if they find themselves born on the wrong side of the border?

    Not to mention that you would be destroying a governing system that while imperfect, has delivered an unparalleled amount of wealth and peace to most of its citizens? We’ve seen how political division played out in Germany, Ireland, Cyprus, and (god forbid) Korea. The halves rarely equal the whole.

  4. Richard Parker

    A Deal is never a Deal with The Woke. It’s moving the goal posts – temporarily,

    The Woke will never let us go – our children are too valuable to them.

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