Bruce Carton very kindly offered to pay my entrance to the Global Happiness Summit. I declined his thoughtful offer.
I am happy. Very happy. Anyone who needs to go to a conference to figure out how to be happy is pathetic. That anyone would even consider holding such a conference is bizarre. If you need a Global Happiness Summit to figure out how to be happy, then you should consider drugs or masturbation. Maybe both.
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“If you need a Global Happiness Summit to figure out how to be happy, then you should consider drugs or masturbation. Maybe both.” <--- QUOTE OF THE YEAR. That about sums up everything, in fewer than 140 characters. Pls RT.
I’m pretty sure I see Greenfield in the background (over the shoulder of the bald guy with sunglasses) at the 15 second mark in the video.
All happy people look alike.
Nice setting for a happiness summit. What makes me happy? Millions of dollars worth of technology designed and built to kill people!
Happiness is a warm gun (bang, bang, shoot, shoot).
I’m two minutes into the video and I had to stop it. Being stuck in the room with those people for several hours would make me want to kill myself.
At two minutes in, I believe you hold the world record. I couldn’t make it that far.
I watched the whole thing, but I thought it was a parody. Then I looked it up and found out it’s a real thing. Now I want to kill myself.
And Windy loses his world record.
Curse you Amy! Curse you Amy Derby, and your inhumanly strong tolerance for bullshit!
Why so harsh on the conference organizers?
Clearly, they identified a field full of cash-filled cows, willing to be milked. So, they milked them. Isn’t that entrepreneurship? Business acumen?
Granted, Barnum and Mencken are characters from history. But their wisdom has been heeded by some, at the expense of others.
Say… how about if they gave that seminar to all in-processing prisoners?
Maybe I’m just jealous that I didn’t think of the scam first?
I know how upset you get when people correct mistakes in your post, but this one is so egregious that I can’t help myself.
You seem to be implying that there are other sources of happiness, besides drugs and masturbation. Please correct (or, if possible, explain).
Cupcakes.
Pudding.
Pie. I like pie.
Nice try, but it’s well known that all drug users chase dope with cupcakes. Wait, you’re probably saying you could eat the cupcakes without the dope.
Good idea. I’ll have to try that.
Desset may be a temporary fix for smack, but its not going to do anything about that jerkoff monkey on your back.