The attorney general’s brief describes the Alexander & Catalano advertising campaign as “frequently embellished with exaggerated images of the firm’s attorneys as giants towering over local buildings, running to assist clients so fast that they appear as a blur, and counseling space aliens on insurance claims.”

Clearly not as funny or deft as Geico’s gecko. But it’s a shot. Some of us might like to see the Skaddens in our midst lighten up a bit, and try this sort of thing. Not Cuomo.

Because the AG thinks counseling space aliens is misleading?  Well, it is.  Definitely.  And maybe it isn’t even as funny as it sounds, though I haven’t seen the commercial.  But that’s not the point.

I agree with Andrew Cuomo 100% that puffery and hyperbole, particularly in promising or suggesting the ability to get particular results, is an evil that has to be quashed.  But does he have to suck the fun out of it?

I can imagine nothing worse than totally serious lawyer ads.  If there is anything that would take the profession’s already spotty reputation and reduce us to the singular most boring people on the face of the earth, it would be lawyer ads as the AG envisions them.

Take a look at my favorite lawyer ad on the sidebar (that’s the column on the left).  Can you tell me that you aren’t laughing as you watch it.  It is hysterical.  Effective?  No, but it would be a lot more fun to see that on the telly than what Andy has in mind.  

[The Supreme Court] has never held that puffery, dramatizations, unverifiable statements of opinion, slogans, or promises, absurd portrayals, extreme use of humor, appeals to emotions, fears or prejudices, special effects, nicknames or other techniques in attorney advertising unrelated to rational decisions about selection of counsel are protected commercial speech,” the attorney general said in his brief.

Mario Cuomo wasn’t a very funny guy.  Clearly, the apple didn’t fall far from the tree.  There is a wide spectrum of possibilities in advertising, ranging from the “Skadden” concept (serious people saying serious stuff) to the Used Car method of  this fellow (which, in my opinion, reflects about the worst deceptive garbage advertising around, though I bet that someone else has something that will trump it).  

I’m with Cuomo that letting lawyer advertising go free market would be a disaster.  There are way too many scoundrels and liars, and they put honest lawyers at significant disadvantage since we won’t guarantee results or lie to steal money.  For any marketing lover who thinks that this is a solution without a problem, you’re way off base.  The problem exists and it’s pretty bad.  But that doesn’t mean the we need a scorched earth solution.  Everything isn’t always black and white.

So does Cuomo really have to try to suck all the fun out of it?  Must lawyers, as a matter of law, be the most boring, humorless people on the face of the earth?  Must we really prove to the public that we are what they think we are?  Wit and humor are not the evils demanding a solution.  Deception and puffery is the problem, so deal with the problem.  In a battle of wits, would you want your lawyer to be unarmed?

Ironically, Andy Cuomo’s position as Attorney General flies in the face of his efforts at advertising his skilled legal services for the years that he practiced privately.   No, wait a second.  That’s right.  Andy Cuomo never has his own law firm, where he had to get clients to earn a living.  He never had to wait for a new case to come in, or a case to settle, to get paid.  He has always been on the government dole, always had a paycheck show up on Friday.  And this is the guy who thinks he understands how regular lawyers get to advertise.

Andy, lighten up.  A little humor won’t kill you, and will certainly do wonders for the profession.  And trust me, no one is going to be misled that I have any special “in” when it comes to cases on Mars.  Of course, I used to be a prosecutor there and I do know the judge . . .  Hey, at least I didn’t use a gecko.