That’s what people want to hear. It makes us happy. It makes us like you. It makes us friends. It’s validation. It’s what we’re looking for on the internet.
The proof of this came to me in a thousand ways, each of which was left here by someone who wanted me to leave up his comment so that the link to his website would remain in the little box, be noticed by Google or you, the reader, and would eventually help to make him money. He knew that by writing something that made me feel validated, the chances were good that I would approve the comment and post it. He played the odds. He played to my ego, my insecurity, my lingering self-doubt, my need for approval. Forget my stomach, validation is the quickest way to a man’s heart. I love you for approving of me.
Put aside that none of these comments received the appreciation their authors expect, or see the light of day. The more important point for the long term is what this says about the nature of the blawgosphere (and the blogosphere, for those who aren’t blogging lawyers). There are a bunch of schemes designed to get readers to read a person’s blog, all sub rosa as far as you, the reader, are concerned, from SEO to comment spamming, to telling others that you couldn’t agree more.
It’s like a big puppet show with Social Media Gurus, Marketers and Public Relations experts, pulling strings to turn lawyers into marketing machines. Where once we were mere lawyers, we are now marketing juggernauts on the internet. Just a few basic concepts will turn us from lone wolves on the prairie to a valued member of a tribe. Make others love you by telling them that you love them. Be authentic, which loosely translated means make other people believe you care deeply about them even though you don’t know them, you know nothing about them and you share nothing in common with them.
It’s really all very easy. Speak no evil. Say nothing to offend. Just tell them you couldn’t agree more. Within minutes, hours at the longest, you will make friends. They will invite you to join their tribe. You will find a home, where you can agree with others and they, in turn, will agree with you. The swell of validation will overwhelm you, and you will bask in the warmth of agreement, feeling wholly validated. Big group hug.
Some criminal defense lawyers prefer that I keep my posts on topic, writing about caselaw, trial experiences, tactics. Sorry, if this seems off topic, but it’s not from where I sit. Too many of you are allowing yourselves to be seduced by validation. There are other areas of the blogosphere that are so absorbed with self-promotion that they cannot bear to be questioned, no less challenged. The discussions range from “I couldn’t agree more” to “you are the most important person in my life and I love you more than life itself.” It’s so sweet. Is this what you want? Is this why you’re here?
I’m not going to name names, because my purpose isn’t to attack you but to persuade you to exist. There are blawgers who agree with everyone, wholly divergent positions notwithstanding. There are blawgers whose posts are so tepid, so devoid of substance, so safe, that no one could disagree with them. God forbid they write anything that takes a position, that means something.
I know why you do it. You want to be loved. You want potential clients to feel that love and want to retain you. You want them to pay you money so you can have a successful law practice. And the good people on the internet who sell sequined cellphone covers want a successful business too. Is that so bad?
And then there are trolls. People who are so filled with hatred and anger that they feel compelled to disagree with even your most tepid, meaningless, impossible to disagree with, post. You’re just trying to make friends, and they won’t be your friend. They won’t agree. They won’t validate you and contribute to the welfare of your tribe. Those people undermine your purpose, your goals, your warm and fuzzy glow of approval. That’s what makes them trolls, at least to you.
If you’re selling sequined cellphone covers, this is understandable. There’s really no pressing societal need for sequined cellphone covers. Some people like them. Some don’t. Some may even like them enough to buy one. But you’re a criminal defense lawyer. You signed on for a higher calling, one that involved the lives of real people and has the potential to help those people or add to their misery. We achieve that through discourse, for when someone posts about a Supreme Court decision and gets it all wrong, or about a trial tactic that makes no sense, someone may read that post and believe you know something. We engage in peer review so that stupid things don’t go unchallenged on the internet, as in the courtroom.
Have some pride in yourself. Stand on your own two feet. If you actually have something to say, have the guts to say it. If you have nothing to say, control the urge to make noise anyway. But if the noise comes out, be lawyer enough to face the challenge.
The internet is rife with naked gurus. Some are just the wastrels who happened to get here before you, and to whom you now look for validation. They have becomes chiefs of tribes only because they were a step ahead of their sycophantic followers, playing the game of agreement so that they will be allowed to join. Their intellectual vapidity, deception and fragile self-esteem is quickly revealed when you give them a poke. They crumble and cry. They know that this internet validation isn’t real, and they fear that their carefully crafted internet personas will crack and expose them to the internet world as worthless.
Being real means more than following the gurus’ advice to be “authentic”. Being real means that you will disagree with someone else’s assertion from time to time. Being real means that you have the fortitude and intelligence to question and challenge. While the rest of the internet may spend their days and nights trying desperately to sell sequined cellphone covers, we are trial lawyers. Think like a trial lawyer. Act like a trial lawyer. Write like a trial lawyer. Be a trial lawyer.
If you’re not behaving like a trial lawyer, and merely agreeing to be part of the tribe, then you might as well sell sequined cellphone covers, or Tony’s Pizza*, because you’ve already sold out.
* Special Added Attraction: There is always something new to learn on the internet, and yesterday was no exception. First, a twit came across my screen about @Rex7, renown for having accumulated more twitter followers than anyone else connected, however remotely, with law.
I was curious as to what this newfangled means of monetizing twitter followers was all about, and Amy Derby alerted me to a new venture, Sponsored Tweets. For a price, you can have celebrities twit your message, from real rock stars to social media rock stars. Remember Tamar Weinberg from these posts? Well, she’s available on page 2, selling her twits, as a “web celeb” and “social media rock star.” Not too many people get to be called “web celebs,” and I didn’t realize how important Tamar was in the internet. Imagine, I had a social media rock star right here, at my humble blawg. Want Tamar to twit for you? It will cost you $294.13.
Rex7 gets $174.38 for a twit. Good for Rex. I hope he makes some decent money. I would retwit his sponsored twits if it gets him a few more dollars. That would be a good cause. My only fear is that my RT would lose him some dough, and I wouldn’t want that to happen.
As George Bernard Shaw (though some attribute this to Winston Churchill) quipped, after getting a woman to agree to sex for a million dollars, “we’ve established what you are. Now we’re just dickering over price.” It doesn’t get more authentic than this.
The proof of this came to me in a thousand ways, each of which was left here by someone who wanted me to leave up his comment so that the link to his website would remain in the little box, be noticed by Google or you, the reader, and would eventually help to make him money. He knew that by writing something that made me feel validated, the chances were good that I would approve the comment and post it. He played the odds. He played to my ego, my insecurity, my lingering self-doubt, my need for approval. Forget my stomach, validation is the quickest way to a man’s heart. I love you for approving of me.
Put aside that none of these comments received the appreciation their authors expect, or see the light of day. The more important point for the long term is what this says about the nature of the blawgosphere (and the blogosphere, for those who aren’t blogging lawyers). There are a bunch of schemes designed to get readers to read a person’s blog, all sub rosa as far as you, the reader, are concerned, from SEO to comment spamming, to telling others that you couldn’t agree more.
It’s like a big puppet show with Social Media Gurus, Marketers and Public Relations experts, pulling strings to turn lawyers into marketing machines. Where once we were mere lawyers, we are now marketing juggernauts on the internet. Just a few basic concepts will turn us from lone wolves on the prairie to a valued member of a tribe. Make others love you by telling them that you love them. Be authentic, which loosely translated means make other people believe you care deeply about them even though you don’t know them, you know nothing about them and you share nothing in common with them.
It’s really all very easy. Speak no evil. Say nothing to offend. Just tell them you couldn’t agree more. Within minutes, hours at the longest, you will make friends. They will invite you to join their tribe. You will find a home, where you can agree with others and they, in turn, will agree with you. The swell of validation will overwhelm you, and you will bask in the warmth of agreement, feeling wholly validated. Big group hug.
Some criminal defense lawyers prefer that I keep my posts on topic, writing about caselaw, trial experiences, tactics. Sorry, if this seems off topic, but it’s not from where I sit. Too many of you are allowing yourselves to be seduced by validation. There are other areas of the blogosphere that are so absorbed with self-promotion that they cannot bear to be questioned, no less challenged. The discussions range from “I couldn’t agree more” to “you are the most important person in my life and I love you more than life itself.” It’s so sweet. Is this what you want? Is this why you’re here?
I’m not going to name names, because my purpose isn’t to attack you but to persuade you to exist. There are blawgers who agree with everyone, wholly divergent positions notwithstanding. There are blawgers whose posts are so tepid, so devoid of substance, so safe, that no one could disagree with them. God forbid they write anything that takes a position, that means something.
I know why you do it. You want to be loved. You want potential clients to feel that love and want to retain you. You want them to pay you money so you can have a successful law practice. And the good people on the internet who sell sequined cellphone covers want a successful business too. Is that so bad?
And then there are trolls. People who are so filled with hatred and anger that they feel compelled to disagree with even your most tepid, meaningless, impossible to disagree with, post. You’re just trying to make friends, and they won’t be your friend. They won’t agree. They won’t validate you and contribute to the welfare of your tribe. Those people undermine your purpose, your goals, your warm and fuzzy glow of approval. That’s what makes them trolls, at least to you.
If you’re selling sequined cellphone covers, this is understandable. There’s really no pressing societal need for sequined cellphone covers. Some people like them. Some don’t. Some may even like them enough to buy one. But you’re a criminal defense lawyer. You signed on for a higher calling, one that involved the lives of real people and has the potential to help those people or add to their misery. We achieve that through discourse, for when someone posts about a Supreme Court decision and gets it all wrong, or about a trial tactic that makes no sense, someone may read that post and believe you know something. We engage in peer review so that stupid things don’t go unchallenged on the internet, as in the courtroom.
Have some pride in yourself. Stand on your own two feet. If you actually have something to say, have the guts to say it. If you have nothing to say, control the urge to make noise anyway. But if the noise comes out, be lawyer enough to face the challenge.
The internet is rife with naked gurus. Some are just the wastrels who happened to get here before you, and to whom you now look for validation. They have becomes chiefs of tribes only because they were a step ahead of their sycophantic followers, playing the game of agreement so that they will be allowed to join. Their intellectual vapidity, deception and fragile self-esteem is quickly revealed when you give them a poke. They crumble and cry. They know that this internet validation isn’t real, and they fear that their carefully crafted internet personas will crack and expose them to the internet world as worthless.
Being real means more than following the gurus’ advice to be “authentic”. Being real means that you will disagree with someone else’s assertion from time to time. Being real means that you have the fortitude and intelligence to question and challenge. While the rest of the internet may spend their days and nights trying desperately to sell sequined cellphone covers, we are trial lawyers. Think like a trial lawyer. Act like a trial lawyer. Write like a trial lawyer. Be a trial lawyer.
If you’re not behaving like a trial lawyer, and merely agreeing to be part of the tribe, then you might as well sell sequined cellphone covers, or Tony’s Pizza*, because you’ve already sold out.
* Special Added Attraction: There is always something new to learn on the internet, and yesterday was no exception. First, a twit came across my screen about @Rex7, renown for having accumulated more twitter followers than anyone else connected, however remotely, with law.
when was the last time you tried one of Tony’s Crispy Crust Pizzas? – http://spn.tw/5FOh get one today! #mmm #TonysPizza #adRex, who is an unemployed law school graduate cum social media/twitter expert, found a way to monetize his collection of followers. I applaud his ingenuity. I applaud the fact that he’s doing something with what he’s got to earn some money. I said as much in a twit, but unfortunately, Rex must have thought I was making fun of him (I wasn’t) or is embarrassed that he’s forced to be a paid twit for Tony’s Pizza, and blocked me on twitter.
I was curious as to what this newfangled means of monetizing twitter followers was all about, and Amy Derby alerted me to a new venture, Sponsored Tweets. For a price, you can have celebrities twit your message, from real rock stars to social media rock stars. Remember Tamar Weinberg from these posts? Well, she’s available on page 2, selling her twits, as a “web celeb” and “social media rock star.” Not too many people get to be called “web celebs,” and I didn’t realize how important Tamar was in the internet. Imagine, I had a social media rock star right here, at my humble blawg. Want Tamar to twit for you? It will cost you $294.13.
Rex7 gets $174.38 for a twit. Good for Rex. I hope he makes some decent money. I would retwit his sponsored twits if it gets him a few more dollars. That would be a good cause. My only fear is that my RT would lose him some dough, and I wouldn’t want that to happen.
As George Bernard Shaw (though some attribute this to Winston Churchill) quipped, after getting a woman to agree to sex for a million dollars, “we’ve established what you are. Now we’re just dickering over price.” It doesn’t get more authentic than this.
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I have worked in the moving industry for 6 years right after college. I’ve noticed that with the current economic environment, many people are seeking the help of long distance moving companies to relocate and find work some place else. My advice is to check various movers by using multiple moving quotes from several D.O.T. approved movers. Avoid dealing with so many flight-by-night operators unfortunately in our industry.
My college days are over, can see what they meant “go into the real world for a job”.
On a post of this nature, I can’t tell you how much I appreciate this comment. I’ve had to remove your many links, of course, rendering this useless from your perspective, but it’s incredibly valuable from mine.
To any lawyer reading this, is this what you want to be? Is this all you think of yourself? Is this why your mommy sent you to law school?
I couldn’t agree with you more. Everything you’ve said in this post is right on the money. I will be bookmarking it and telling all my friends about it. viagra, demi moore nude, russian brides, etc.
Great.
Scott,
When you consider the total amount of time you spend on Simple Justice, about how much of it is devoted to filtering spam?
When my blog goes live, I’d like to allow comments but would go nuts if I had to spend most of my blogging time dealing with spam.
Jesus… its like Idiocracy… where the secretary of the interior gets paid money every time he says “brought to you by Carl’s Jr.”
Normally, it’s inconsequential, and I probably get more than most. This past month has been a headache, but I hope it will quiet down when the backlink spammers get a fresh list and no longer come here.