A Competition? Oh Boy!

This unsolicited email just arrived, and I can’t begin to tell you how excited it made me.

Scott,

I am very excited to announce the beginning of The Expert Institute’s first-ever best legal blog competition. From medical malpractice to intellectual property and criminal law, we’re creating the largest and most comprehensive ranking of legal blogs online today – and we want your blog to earn a spot on the list.

Everything you need to get started can be found here:

[Ed. Note: Link deleted because I can’t trust some of you yahoos not to use it.]

The best blogs will win well-deserved exposure to our monthly readership of more than 200,000 legal professionals, while the three blogs that receive the most votes overall will win cash prizes.

To participate, your blog needs to be nominated by your readers via the nomination form located on the page above. The nomination process is competitive, so the more nominations your blog receives, the more likely it is to be included in the contest. If your blog receives enough nominations, it will automatically be entered into the competition, at which point I will contact you with the good news.

Please feel free to reach out if you have any questions.

Best Regards,

Joe


Joseph O’Neill | Senior Associate, Marketing
E: [email protected] | P: 646-216-2339
75 Maiden Lane | Suite 704 | New York, NY 10038

So you’re the shill for some website trying to sell expert witness services, and if enough of my readers “nominate” me, I might be worthy of best blog competition?  From you?

Hmm. Yeah, not really interested, Joe, but thanks for reminding me that there is no end to the bullshit, vanity and deception available to lawyers today.

Can I interest you in a plaque for being in the Top 1% of Irrelevant People on the Internet?  Special price for you, only $149.99.

Lawyers, these are scams. By engaging, participating, joining and paying, you encourage and enable these scams. Do you want to be Carl David Ceder, pathetic and desperate enough to buy this crap?

And clients, any lawyer with a phony award is trying to tell you that he has to pay to manufacture a persona, and thinks you’re stupid enough not to realize it.  Let him know you’re not buying.  Let her know you want an honest lawyer, not someone who enables scams.

18 thoughts on “A Competition? Oh Boy!

  1. Jim Tyre

    I’m glad that, at least three times, they say “Carl Cedar, Attorney at Law.” Else, probably I would have thought he was a mortician.

  2. Fubar

    This unsolicited email just arrived, and I can’t begin to tell you how excited it made me.

    [ Right.

    The first I ever heard of “the expert institute” was when they started spamming me. They spammed me steadily for about a year. Then they suddenly stopped. The only excitement was when I thought I had figured out a way to overcome CAN-SPAM preemption and go after them under state law at a statutory $1000 per email. The excitement quickly abated when they stopped short of the amount in controversy minimum for diversity jurisdiction.

    They are snowshoe spammers. They send just enough spam to any individual to avoid being hit with a suit by an individual recipient. I have little doubt that they “harvest” attorney email addresses by automated means, which would overcome federal preemption. But proving it in one individual case is another matter.

    On the bright side, even a few attorneys complaining about their spam to the service that actually transmits it would likely put a hitch in their getalong. Legitimate email providers do not like to hear complaints about senders who abuse their service.

    There are also anti-spam organizations who would be delighted to assist anybody who wished to put a stop to their spamming.
    ]

    1. David M.

      I found one in my spam folder too.

      David,

      commemorate your lawsome successes
      with a purchase of porcine caresses.
      We wax the pigs daily,
      belipstick them gaily
      and stuff them in fanciful dresses.

      Best Regards,
      Joe

  3. Marc R

    SHG,

    Scrolling to the bottom of your awards there’s clearly space for another banner. I know you’re too humble, so Reddit/law is starting a campaign to assure you the cash prize plus an award. Let me know the size of the shrimp at their award cocktail evening.

    I think avvo ranks this award worth .2 bumps upwards.

    Mazel Tov,

    SEO Slackoise, JD

    1. SHG Post author

      It would be a far greater honor to win an award from reddit. And you know what I think of reddit.

  4. Stephen Heath

    Weak marketing.

    I bet if they had smartly inserted the word “Scott” at least a half dozen more times in appropriate places, you would have realized their true level of fandom for SJ

  5. Dan Hull

    Got the same one. Passed it on to a looter (employee) to get filled out. Then got another email from the same Irish moron saying I was a racist, woman hater and sexual deviate and that it was revoked. Bad year. By the way, Scott, what are you wearing? Like right now?

    1. SHG Post author

      None of you business, you racist, woman hater and sexual deviate. Which, I note, are your better qualities.

      1. Hull

        Thanks. Means a lot. Working, too, on my problem with French-Canadians. And with people from Utah and Milwaukee. Both issues addressed via new program called On-the-Edge Lawyer that makes all JDs 100% equal to each other and forever.

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