Kozinski Resigns, And The Fools Rejoice (Update)

Ninth Circuit judge Alex Kozinski called it quits.

I cannot be an effective judge and simultaneously fight this battle. Nor would such a battle be good for my beloved federal judiciary. And so I am making the decision to retire, effective immediately.

And indeed, this was true, both from the perspective of his inability to be effective as a judge with an inquiry pending and, given the allegations made against him, the taint regardless of the outcome of the inquiry.

And the mindless morons on the ground went nuts. A sexmonster!!!

Assuming that some, even if not all, the allegations against him are true, then he did much over the decades of his tenure on the circuit that was bad, inappropriate and, according to your level of sensitivity, reprehensible. His resignation, at this time and under these circumstances, was likely inevitable.

But this is no moment to cheer, and only the truly insipid believers will be so myopic as to do so. Consider:

  1. The claims against Koz go back years, decades; it’s not as if these are brand new, fresh, he just did it yesterday complaints.
  2. The people who are complaining sat silently for years, decades, without saying a word. He was such a monster, yet they said nothing? It wasn’t so bad that they could bear silent witness while others walked into his trap.
  3. Everyone knew it, but everyone kept silent? Is there some bravery to being silent about a monster?
  4. The same people who are now coming forward, when it’s popular to be the accuser, enjoyed basking in Koz’s reflected glory all these years. They got jobs, Supreme Court clerkships, feathers in their cap by being a Koz clerk, and they wore those feathers proudly for decades. Hey, look at me, I was a Koz clerk!!!
  5. As a judge, Koz did some things that were exceptionally good, extremely bold. How many judges came out against the epidemic of Brady concealment?
  6. And now, in the heat of passion, where there were some very serious (if decades old) accusations, but mostly petty ones, where the piling on went untested by those who preferred to believe because it’s the fashionable thing to do, where there is no room for any thoughts of proportionality, since Koz was a monster and the only thing to do with a monster is kill it, those with an excess of passion and a dearth of depth are thrilled at his demise, cleansing their moral universe of this tainted waste of life.
  7. And in his place will be nominated someone more suitable to President Donald Trump.

What a glorious day for the moral universe of women.

O frabjous day! Callooh! Callay!’
He chortled in his joy.

`Twas brillig, and the slithy toves
Did gyre and gimble in the wabe;
All mimsy were the borogoves,
And the mome raths outgrabe.

Kozinski is gone. What a glorious day. He had to go, but there is nothing to cheer about. This is a terrible day, but tomorrow will likely be even worse.

Tell your clients, as their appeals are affirmed by a newly appointed Ninth Circuit judge, how it’s all worth it to get rid of that monster Kozinski for the things no one could bother to mention he did decades earlier. Your client will understand.

Update: I’m not sure whether to be flattered or offended by this:

There’s a peculiar weirdness when people I don’t actually know assume that something I’ve written is about them. There’s probably a psychological term for it, other than narcissism, but for someone to desire my attention this badly, and thus to make a false claim about me, seems par for the course in these deranged days. Sorry, dude, but nothing I’ve ever written at SJ is about you, whoever you are.

33 thoughts on “Kozinski Resigns, And The Fools Rejoice (Update)

  1. Jim Tyre

    And the mindless morons on the ground went nuts.

    “The parties are advised to chill.” Mattel, Inc. v. MCA Records, Inc., 296 F.3d 894, 908 (9th Cir. 2002) (Kozinski)

  2. John Barleycon

    Lots can happen in-between Jeopardy and the Wheel of Fortune…


    I do hope this was just a poke though and that after sleeping on it you will compose a more worthy epitaph.

    Someone has to saddle up and ride the “Monster” Koz, especially now, seeing as how he has decided to spare the steel tubes of the chute and yield to the sanctity of the “beloved” before things got rough.

    1. SHG Post author

      I’m neither his defender nor detractor, but the hypocrisy and idiocy this has revealed within the social justice criminal defense bar and the intellectual class is a disgrace. I wanted to deal with that before the mob got up a full head of steam.

  3. B. McLeod

    Per the current, off-the-rack political correctness dogma, there are indeed many direct and indirect enablers who should resign from whatever gainful employment they may have, in order to atone for their personal roles in the decades of cover up.

  4. Norahc

    #7 is a perfect example of the Law of Unintended Consequences.

    I wouldn’t be surprised if next week we start hearing calls that Darth Cheeto shouldn’t be allowed to nominate a judge to replace him.

  5. Richard Kopf


    “All at once, Robert was screaming and struggling with the strength of frenzy. Jack had him by the hair and was brandishing his knife. Behind him was Roger, fighting to get close. The chant rose ritually, as at the last moment of a dance or a hunt.

    ‘Kill the pig! Cut his throat! Kill the pig! Bash him in!’

    Ralph too was fighting to get near, to get a handful of that brown, vulnerable flesh. The desire to squeeze and hurt was over-mastering.”

    All the best.


  6. B. McLeod

    After 35 years on the federal bench, he should have a pretty decent pension to retire on. Kind of reminds me of Br’er Rabbit and the briar patch.

    1. SHG Post author

      His annuity will be based upon reaching sufficient years of service + age. Better question is what happens if, even though he’s retired, he’s still impeached?

  7. pav

    I don’t think it’s necessary to brag about being called a moron by SHG. All ya have to do for that is post a comment!

    1. SHG Post author

      In the world of social justice warriors, it’s apparently a matter of some pride to be made a victim by being called a name by me. That they haven’t earned it in their own right doesn’t mean they can claim it to their echo chamber.

      1. LocoYokel

        Does that mean I can post links to the 3 or 4 verifiable times you have called me a moron or idiot and get SJW points? SWEET!

        Not that I’m really interested in the SJW points per se, but I don’t get many of any other kind either and some points are better than none.

        Completely off topic to today’s posts but on topic for some you have posted, I give you this.


      2. Billy Bob

        SHG is the P.T Barnum of the blawgosphere. Stiegler. Matthew is enterprising; we’ll give him that much. Hey Pav, we’re drawing a Big Blank? Some of our comments are actually brilliant. Check the archives! Could you run that by us again? Oh, I get it now: Post an idiiotic comment and get taken to the ethereal woodshed in the sky. (Been there, done that.) Or did we get it backwards? End.

  8. Suzi

    I read some of the reactions to your tweets on this. What is wrong lawyers? Do they not realize they sound like 12 year old girls, crying over nothing? Especially [deleted], who seems obsessed with you but just comes off like she’s stupid. It scares me that people like this can be responsible for representing people.

    1. SHG Post author

      As I’ve Rule 1’d the person, I’ve deleted the name. I worry about the same thing a lot lately. It’s not that lawyers are necessarily geniuses, but that they seem to feel as empowered as anyone else to forsake the hard work of thinking in favor of the easy button of feeling. They just can’t be bothered to put in the effort.

      There is no expedient to which a man will not resort to avoid the real labor of thinking.
      –Sir Joshua Reynolds

    1. SHG Post author

      Good to know it’s that simple. I can’t imagine why so many lawyers waste so much time thinking when it’s that simple

        1. SHG Post author

          Shouldn’t you have known the answer to that question before you simplistically convicted and executed him? At first, he didn’t specifically deny the allegations, though he didn’t admit them either. He later issued a vague denial through his attorney, Susan Estrich.

          In a statement read by one of his lawyers, Susan Estrich of the firm Quinn Emanuel Urquhart and Sullivan, Kozinski said: “Many of the things that are being said about me are simply not true, but I deeply regret that my unusual sense of humor caused offense or made anyone uncomfortable.”

          Is it still all so simple? Are you still ready to be the executioner?

          1. Miles

            You got trolled, amigo. Neal said absolutely nothing. It is because IT ISSSSSS!!!!! And here you are, spending your time trying to have a discussion about it? About what? Neal’s the fool in the title, and he made you the fool in the comments.

        2. Patrick Maupin

          Obviously a denial or lack thereof is dispositive. Good thinking — we can dispense with the judges as well as the lawyers!

    2. Norahc

      How about its nothing but unproven accusations at this point since all the apparent victims waited years, or even decades, to come forward. Makes it impossible to investigate properly or even defend against.

      And can someone explain why our society insists at looking at past actions through today’s moral standards, instead of the ones that were in place at the time?

      1. Kathleen Casey

        Right and wrong are immutable.

        Some people abuse their power because they can and the abuse escalates when everyone walks on eggshells and no one calls them on it. Bullies are cowards and they are apt to back down when you yell Knock It Off! But be prepared to walk away or get canned just the same. Most people don’t have the fortitude to see a different path from their little groove to a life of integrity. They quake and shrink from the prospect of raising hell and so be it if they have to go…somewhere. But abuse situations escalate if left to fester.

        Each chamber is akin to its own law firm but the courts are a club and judges have their whisper networks. The other circuit judges knew or made their reasonable inferences in all likelihood. What’s right is right, that they knew. And some of them shared the bench with Koz for decades, isn’t that true? They could have done something even if it were the wrong thing. That didn’t happen. I suppose they were sheeple too. And I’m sorry to see him go.

        1. SHG Post author

          “Right and wrong are immutable”? Right and wrong are whatever anyone feels they are. Facts are objective. Truth is subjective. Right and wrong are just one person’s truth.

        2. B. McLeod

          Joan of Arc was burned as a heretic, now she’s a saint. Not much involving human “right” and “wrong” is “immutable.” Maybe not anything.

Comments are closed.