What does actress Jenna Fischer from The Office have to do with racism? The initial responce would likely be, “nothing, as far as I’m aware,” but that’s likely because you’re not sufficiently woke to connect the invisible dots. Fischer, herself, may have nothing whatsoever to do with racism, but she draws people’s attention because of her celebrity. And that’s close enough.

Several dozen students interrupted an event featuring actress Jenna Fischer at DePauw University Tuesday to protests recent racial incidents on and near campus.

Many of them held signs with things claiming they are “afraid for their lives” after recent events.

If you think cops these days are too afraid, it’s nothing compared with students, who function under the belief that a word will break their bones.

University Spokesman Ken Owen, who was moderating the lecture with Fischer, said about 15 minutes into the program a group of students got up and began interrupting the event whistling, shouting and saying they were afraid for their safety on campus because of the recent racial incidents.

Last week, a hateful message was found written in a bathroom at the university. The message, which read ” All ******* must die -KKK,” was written on a bathroom wall of the Inn at DePauw, a public building on campus. Another [sic] anti-Semitic and homophobic messages were also found.

Whether this was protest worthy, or “afraid for their lives” worthy, they still took over Jenna Fischer’s stage for their own purposes because if they had thrown a protest of their own, no one would have come, seen, listened or cared. So they had to take her, and that, alone, is what Jenna Fischer had to do with racism.

And the putative grown-ups at DePauw failed to consider that these teary students hijacked Jenna Fischer’s stage for their own purposes.

Today, students in our community, exercising their right to be heard, expressed their fear and frustration during a community leaders’ meeting this afternoon and a celebrity guest lecture this evening.

Did they apologize to Jenna Fischer for putting her in the middle of this? Not exactly.

Students who need support or a space to gather together can go to the Hartman House or Center for Diversity and Inclusion.

Okay, not at all. But this is DePauw University, a small private liberal arts college in Indiana. Surely this wouldn’t happen at an elite university. Like, say, Duke?

Two dozen student activists crashed an alumni event at Duke University on Saturday, using a megaphone to make their demands and drown out the speaker, Duke President Vincent Price.

Another stage. Another event. And most significantly, an event having absolutely nothing to do with their protests, but merely an opportunity to hijack the stage for their own purposes. Ironically, the alumni event was to celebrate the 50th Anniversity of another protest.*

The protest happened during an alumni event reflecting on the 50th anniversary of the 1968 Silent Vigil at Duke, a series of student-led sit-ins on campus. Nuzzolillo and his comrades sought to channel the spirit of the Silent Vigil, although their protest was anything but silent. About 25 students stormed the stage inside Page Auditorium while Price was speaking and chanted, “President Price get off the stage,” and “Whose university? Our university,” until they had command of the room. Then they read a list of demands, which included raising the university’s minimum wage to $15 an hour, hiring more faculty members of color, and spending more money on counseling services.

Did they steal the right stage? If the alums were there to remember an old protest, wouldn’t they certainly support a new one, including shouting off the stage the person they were there to hear? Kinda like coming to hear Cream play White Room and being forced to endure Mötley Crüe doing Girls, Girls, Girls** instead.

The students were surprised to discover that their interruption had irritated many alumni in the audience, some of whom heckled the activists and turned their backs while the demands were read.

Not that young people are a bit narcissistic and entitled, operating under the certainty that no one could possibly not desire to hear their every idea, and obviously support them in their fight, but the alumni weren’t nearly as supportive as the students expected.

Even more shocking was that the administration failed to provide the protesters with puppies and Play-Doh.

The protesters received mixed reactions from the alumni in the audience. Some alumni did nothing while others booed loudly or clapped in support. Many alumni stood up and turned their backs to the stage, some shouting vulgarities—the protesters reported hearing racial epithets.

The protesters noted that they were surprised by the extent of the alumni’s negative reactions. [Student organizer Bryce] Cracknell added that he was disappointed that the administrators focused more on stopping the students than angry alumni, Cracknell said.

“Instead of actually going to the alumni and saying ‘that’s not appropriate’ or removing them from the space, they were more worried about us,” Cracknell said.

Just so it doesn’t slide past too quickly, student organizer Cracknell’s dismay was that the administration didn’t remove the alumni from the space, the one that was for the alums and which Cracknell hijacked, for being too disrespectful to the hijackers.

Protest “leader” Gina Nuzzolillo expressed disappointment that the adults “whose job it is to care for us” failed to do so. Or as Robby Soave puts it:

They want to be celebrated as resistance fighters and treated like trauma victims. The student activists of 2018 require a lot of hand holding as they overthrow their oppressors.

And they want to do so on somebody else’s platform, because they would otherwise be protesting in a room empty but for the puppies.

*One might, if one connects the invisible dots, see an attenuated analogy between the Silent Vigil of 1968, following the assassination of Martin Luther King, with today’s students protesting today’s issues. But “channeling the spirit” is a euphemistic way of saying hijacking, and the dots don’t connect at all.

**Uh oh.