They say a picture is worth a thousand words. Rarely is that more true than here.
This was the “major announcement” of a putative candidate for president, that he was selling NFTs of his thin and manly fantasy self. Was this his way of demonstrating his self-loathing or just another grift to see how stupid his followers were, whether they would spend good money to buy the Trump version of the Barbie Dream House?
When Donald Trump teased a “major announcement” Wednesday, the MAGA boards went crazy with speculation. He’s going to be the next speaker of the House! He’s enlisted Ron DeSantis to be his vice presidential candidate! He’s finally found that voter fraud he’s been promising for two years!
But no, it was a digital card collection of Trump dressed up like a superhero. In other words, another money grab.
Another? Indeed.
He raised nearly $100 million promising to “stop the steal” and spent almost none of it on lawsuits or inquiries related to 2020 — because he knew, despite his rhetoric, that there was no steal. He sent emails about how important the midterms were, then banked most of what he raised for his endorsed candidates. These war chests pay for the salaries of families and allies, private jets, expenses — and get funneled into Trump’s other companies through hotel bills, consulting and fees.
For some time, I’ve been saying that Trump has two, and only two, motivations, self-aggrandizement and self-enrichment. But even so, this takes his delusion to a new depth, one wrapping up so many of his failings in what may be the singularly most absurd thing Trump has ever done. And in the case of a guy who announced he was a “stable genius,” smarter than the generals, et al., and recited five words to prove his sanity, that’s not easy to do.
According to the site where he’s hawking the NFTs with the inducement of maybe winning a round of golf with him, these NFTs, at a price of $99 per “trading card” with a “strict maximum limit of 100” per person, are “sold out.” Oh?
Remember Trump steaks? Trump ties? Trump University? Even casinos, the one business in which it’s nearly impossible to fail, he failed. But this plumbs new depths on lunacy atop failure. If you somehow talked yourself out of realizing this before, can you do so again? The New York Post can’t.
Fool us once, shame on you. Fool us 1,438 times, and it may finally be too much.
So what compelled Trump to do something so stunningly awful that denying his lunacy is impossible to any modestly sentient human being? Is he nuts or broke? Why not both?
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Partially, as Ozzy Osbourne sang,
“How ’bout it’s just an exposure
How could you fuck us all over
Rape, steal, and murder, got us the almighty dollar
The almighty dollar.”
Or something like that.
Sold out? Of course they are.
As I said to the people shocked at what he did in 2016: “Can you really fault a guy for using a winning strategy?”
To be accurate, don’t they have to be?
I would buy SHG trading cards…….Just a thought.
Just sent some money for one of the lower level trading cards. I didn’t have $100 available.. 🙂
Very kind of you. Your NFT is in the mail.
Are his daughters on OnlyFans yet?
I’m disappointed. I was hoping for an announcement that he had accepted Kanye’s VP offer.
It is known; old Donnie Deals never saw a licensing opportunity he didn’t like. This insight is so reliable it could be a vector for bad actors whose real goal is to damage the brand.
Why wasn’t this “Major Announcement” made at “Four Season’s Landscaping”? Why this disrespect for tradition?
At least they didn’t use actual images of Il Douche wearing spandex. It would take gallons of Visine to wash that image from my mind’s eye…
I’d say both. If he wasn’t broke he’d have made an attempt to create his own cryptocurrency. Why should Washington and Lincoln be on the legal tender and not him? Maybe thats next.
There’s no “round” of golf to be won. I read a comment elsewhere that a round of golf would create the risk of losing—which would violate the tenet of self-aggrandizement—so it’s actually a chance to win an hour of golf.
But then I checked the website. Not only is it an hour, it actually sounds more like putt-putt: “Join Donald _on the green_ for an exclusive 1-hour of golf with your 2 closest friends.”
News alert! This just in from Raw Story: “Notorious Capitol rioter Tim Gionet, better known as ‘Baked Alaska,’ was suddenly filled with regret after watching former President Donald Trump hawk digital trading cards in a video in which he also declared himself a better president than George Washington.”
Going out on a limb here, but I bet he sold 12 of them, all to Lindsey Graham who is home right now masturbating to them.
Now that’s something that my mind’s eye cannot unsee. Thanks, Sarge.
I think that this “major announcement” was great. I hope that the Bad Orange Man spends the next two years hawking products and reviving Trump University. The more time spent on that stuff, the better.
And don’t forget to drink your Ovaltine.
All the products Alex Jones used to push need a new spokesthing.
Why is the featured card named “Rump Towe”?
Jewish space laser would probably suffice.