The District of Columbia, the bastion of democracy and home of the brave, has come up with a brilliant idea, according to The Newspaper.  You see, when people got tickets, they showed up at the Department of Motor Vehicles and challenged them.  Sure, it allowed for due process, but it was bad for revenue.

The solution was plain.  If due process was screwing up a great revenue stream, get rid of it.  Duh!  And so they will.  It appears that the DC DMV will no longer allow the lucky recipients of tickets to appear.  They can still send in their objections to the tickets by mail (thus giving the appearance of due process), but DMV employees in a back room somewhere can pull out their “guilty” stamp and make the objections go away en masse.  You get your day in court.  They get their revenue.

You see, it’s a lot harder to say no to a person standing in front of you who has just given an overwhelming presentation on why they should not have received a ticket.  It makes the administrative judges feel very bad when they hear people they know are right but have to find them guilty nonetheless.  Talk about a hostile work environment.  It is so much easier when you don’t have to look into their eyes as you do the wrong thing.

Plus, if there’s nobody in front of you, you don’t have to explain yourself.  After all, nobody would be satisfied with an administrative judge’s decision that goes along the lines of

“Well, Ms. Smith, your testimony certainly explains why you should not have received a ticket, but you must certainly realize that the employees of the District of Columbia need to be paid every week, and the taxpayers feel overwhelmed already so our elected officials feel compelled to avoid a tax increase at any cost.  I’m sure you understand.  Pay the clerk on the way out.  Next!”

So if you live in D.C., or just happen to be visiting our nation’s capital, stop asking what the government can do for you and just write a check.  On the bright side, it’s the first new solution that’s come out of Washington in a long time.  But before you make fun of Washington, D.C. for this stroke of brilliance, bear in mind that this is an idea that’s coming to a city near you soon.