Glen Lerner is the very picture of a self-aggrandizing personal injury lawyer in Las Vegas.  He bills himself as the “Heavy Hitter” of the PI bar, according to the Las Vegas Review-Journal.

Lerner is widely known for his colorful commercials and catchy jingles. In one, he spins like the cartoon Tasmanian Devil. In another, he boasts that insurance companies sent him more than $25 million in settlements.

But Lerner took one step too far outside his comfort zone when he decided that his genius at settling PI cases extended to representing a defendant accused of murder.  He apparently assumed that cases are cases, and criminal cases were just some minor variation on his ordinary theme of bringing the case to the edge of trial and then settling.  Ah, the life of a civil litigation.  All that swagger ending in just another bluff.

His client, Mario Lino, was facing life in prison for the murder of his wife.  The case was on for trial.  And Lerner was nowhere to be found.  The judge was not amused. 

Judge Michelle Leavitt also was angry because Lerner, a personal injury lawyer, told the district attorney’s office he wasn’t going to appear in court to defend his client, because he was out of state “on sabbatical” and didn’t care if the judge punished him, a county prosecutor said.

Remember, the defendant is standing there in court, no lawyer to be found, about to go on trial and the judge, with jurors waiting, is furious and about to hold his lawyer in contempt.  So what does “Heavy Hitter” Lerner have to say?

Reached in Pennsylvania, Lerner said he didn’t attend the trial because he was out of state and wasn’t prepared to go to trial. He said he called the district attorney’s office last week to work out a deal for Lino, and when that failed he told the prosecutor that he wanted the trial delayed while he prepared for the case.

Now that might be a brilliant plan when handling a PI case (though I somehow think that PI lawyers will think otherwise), but the idea of first preparing the case while the jurors are waiting may be a little too late.

Now I’m sure that every lawyer who thinks that he’s a “player” and can handle a criminal case (and wants to get his hands on that up-front legal fee for some quick cash) thinks that this can’t be that hard and he can do it.  But what does Lerner think of his “representation”?

“I’d rather be sanctioned than railroad my guy into accepting 25 years in prison,” Lerner said.

Well, Glen, there is another option.  How about being competent and prepared?  Obviously, that never occurred to him.  The moral of the story is a simple one.  If you don’t know how to handle a criminal case, send it to someone who does.  A murder trial is no place for amateurs.

Updated:  Eric the Turk of  New York Personal Injury Law Blog reminds me that this is a two-way street for those who think that any idiot can handle a PI case.  He tells a story of incompetence by a well-known criminal defense lawyer (I know very well the lawyer Eric posts about, but has left unnamed, and trust me that this lawyer was as much of a dufus as a criminal defense lawyer, though somehow his clients never seemed to have a clue why he put on such a great show but kept blowing their cases) who decides he can dabble in PI.  Agian, don’t mess with people’s lives when you don’t know what you’re doing.