Wanted: criminal defense attorney. No we are not in trouble with the law. We need a guest for a segment! Anybody interested?

ChicagoNonstop

CHINonstop

Clearly, the NBC affiliate in Chicago wasn’t being terribly discriminating by seeking a criminal defense lawyer to fill airtime via twitter.  No mention of subject.  No mention of qualifications. No concern whatsoever that they might put some blithering idiot on air to spew foolishness and render their audience stupider than when they started.  Television isn’t all that picky.  In fact, if some non-lawyer offered to do the gig, chances are pretty good that they wouldn’t know. 

My new pal responded to this want twit:

@ChicagoNonstop I am a criminal defense attorney in Texas. Former prosecutor. Harvard Law Grad.

Since we were now buds, I twitted that he might want to approach things a bit differently.  Aside from doing this in full view of the twitting public (which doesn’t seem to disturb ChicagoNonstop in the slightest), he might want to find out what the subject is to determine whether he can contribute something.  Or just fill air time. Or have no clue what he’s talking about, but talk nonetheless.  Nonstop.

I told my new friend that I understood how young lawyers wanted to get their name out there, market themselves, but responding to such a twitter query looked, well, incredibly desperate and slutty.  Assuming, as I do, that my pal was a fine young lawyer of great potential, I would hate to see him tainted by either ill-advice twits or becoming a media whore, willing to talk at the drop of a hat on any subject just to get his face on air.

But his response to ChicagoNonstop was also a bit troubling.  It wasn’t enough to respond that he was a criminal defense lawyer. To prove his worth (as if ChicagoNonstop was discriminate when it twitted for anyone with a pulse), he added that he was a former prosecutor.  And a Harvard law grad. 

You’ll notice that I haven’t mentioned the name, either twitter or real, of my new friend.  He seems like a fine young lawyer, and his goal of getting some recognition to juice his new solo practice is what all the social media marketing pundits tell him he must do.

But my buddy came off as a desperate, sleazy, media whore, willing to say or do anything to make a buck.  I warned him off this, and he responded that I was right, that he’s a strong lawyer but a babe in the social media woods.

Then I went to his website and say this:

I have the inside knowledge, training, education, and experience to guide you through this difficult time.  I was educated at Harvard Law School and have worked as a felony, juvenile, and misdemeanor prosecutor . . .

Oh, man.  I wish he hadn’t gone and said that, my new friend.  Is he really trying to sell his “inside knowledge” to clients?  The old “wink,” where the former prosecutor wants potential customers clients to believe that by hiring him, they get an insider, the sweet deal that only a former prosecutor can get them.  Oh my.

My sense from twitting with my new friend is that he’s out there trying to make his way in the world of criminal defense lawyers, after his stint in the prosecutor’s office, and doing everything, and I mean everything, he can to promote himself.  He’s listening to the voices on the internet.  Not mine, unfortunately, but the voices more numerous, louder, more strident, that tell young lawyer to market the crap out of themselves, play every edge to the hilt, push the envelope till it won’t move any more, and more than anything else, get you beautiful face on the television.

What does a curmudgeon like me have to add?  Work hard. Have some patience. Be dignified and serve your clients well?  Who wants to hear stuff like that.

I told my new buddy my thoughts, and he responded that he never thought of it that way, and appreciated seeing it through a different set of eyes. 

I hope my suggestions help my new friend.  I closed by telling that I understood the desire to establish oneself in a new practice and get some recognition, but then asked him whether this was the type of lawyer he wanted to be.  I think not.  I hope not.

The things I have to offer pale in comparison to the smiles, air kisses and hugs of others, who embrace young lawyers as they are and lure them in with promises of wealth and prestige.  They are the sirens of the internet, offering what every lawyer wants.  I can’t promise any of these wonderful things, but only dignity and integrity.  This may not translate to fabulous success on the internet.  It may mean nothing more than personal pride and satisfaction in serving one’s clients well, and a good night’s sleep.  How can I compare?

But as a lawyer, what choice do I have?  If I have to reach out to every young lawyer who puts himself on my radar to counter the voices the tell them to strut down the boulevard in hot pants, then that’s what I’ll do.  I’m just one voice, and there’s a cacophony of social media marketers out there saying I’m wrong.

After hanging with my new pal for a bit, I was happy that another young lawyer decided not to squander his Harvard law education.  Maybe one at a time is the best I can do, but I’ll keep plugging away.  I think my new friend is going to make one heck of a criminal defense lawyer.