While I’ve heard rumblings about some of the stuff Jordan Rushie explains, it was never really worth my time to look into it. I’m well past my dating years, and have no plans to go back. The whole notion of “the game” and the “red pill” are, from my distance, kinda funny, the sort of things that clog young men’s minds while the hormones that kept humanity going continued to flow dangerously.
Sure, I was aware of the introduction of gender studies in liberal arts education, which struck me as a worthwhile course of study as soon as someone opens up a chain of gender stores. But then, philosophy majors weren’t in high demand either.
Needless to say, we’ve moved far from the days of Aristotle and Camus, and philosophizing about important yet practical topics like a natural order, morality, primary cause, virtue, ethics, and the meaning of our existence. It seems to me that academia is currently focused on pushing a third wave feminism ideal.
As a single guy in my 30s, all of this feminist gender studies stuff has absolutely no practical application to me. It won’t help me be a better lawyer, make more money, or live a more fulfilling life. In contrast, I will often refer back to classical philosophy for inspiration or perspective. A manuscript on cisgender heteronormative white male privilege, not so much.
The relative value of philosophy versus feminism as a major is a fight for someone else to make. It’s not that I don’t appreciate the value of learning the deep thought of those handful of individuals whose ideas have survived millennia of scrutiny, as opposed to an article in Glamour Magazine about Gloria Steinem, together with advice about which lipstick matches one’s complexion, but neither goes to a particularly marketable skill. If someone wants to spend four years and a ton of money to learn about why they’re victims of the patriarchy, it’s no skin off my nose. Go for it.
Interestingly, a “masculinity movement” and philosophy is rapidly growing on the internet. And it’s worth taking a look at it.
Well, it started with some guys trying to get laid. Nice guys with good jobs were wondering why women weren’t physically attracted to them, even though they “were doing everything right.” Then in 2005, Neil Strauss came along wrote “The Game”, which began to analyze the nature of sexual encounters between men and women in a very mainstream way.
This is where it all turns creepy. If I understand the thrust of Jordan’s post correctly, young men tried to be the kind of guys that feminist studies majors said they wanted to have sex with, and still they couldn’t get a date. Women didn’t find them attractive, even though they were emotionally open and supportive, shaved their chest and wore hipster jeans.
So they decided to analyze it?
Slowly, men began to realize that while acting feminine was the politically correct thing to do, and it got them lots of likes on Facebook, it didn’t exactly land them girlfriends. I’m sure all you single guys in the dating market have heard this line: “you’re a really nice guy, but I just don’t feel the spark.”
And why is that? It turns out that even in a world where men are encouraged to act feminine, women still prefer having sex with masculine men.
From the perspective of a guy who hasn’t had a date in well over thirty years, this all sounds utterly idiotic. You’re guys. Be guys. Guys don’t study why they’re guys, or what it means to be a guy. We just are. We like guy stuff for no better reason than that’s what we like. We like bacon. We like football. We like cars. We like action movies and we do not like rom coms.
Be who you are. Who gives a damn what someone else tells you to be? So what if “society” tells you to be more feminine, more sensitive? If you don’t like to eat sushi, don’t eat sushi. Do you really need to study this in college? Just man up.
There is nothing wrong with liking pink and having a burning desire to do the vacuuming. If that’s your thing, then that’s what you should do. And if it’s not, you still have to do the vacuuming, because rooms don’t vacuum themselves. But you don’t have to like it.
But if you start talking about being masculine as if it’s an academic course of study, then you’re no different than those who major in feminist studies. They sit around and whine about the misery of their gender, and you’re doing the same thing, just from the other side. That’s not how guys work, and anyone who tells you that your need to be whoever you are depends on your wasting one second of your life discussing it is no manly man.
I’m not the world’s most masculine man, but I know what I am, and I’m glad I’m a man. It’s what I am, and what I want to be. It’s right for me. I don’t need anyone’s approval to be a man. I don’t seek anyone’s validation.
Stop talking about it. Stop writing books about it. Stop making Youtube videos about it. Don’t be ashamed of it, and don’t let anyone make you feel ashamed for being who you are. And for crying out loud, do not characterize it as a course of academic study. If you’re a guy, just be a guy. If you’re still unclear how to accomplish this, pull my finger.