Short Take: To Watch Or To Be Watched

Amidst the avalanche of male sexual deviancy is a surprising trend. Harvey Weinstein did it. Louis CK did it. They masturbated in front of women. I rarely agree with the New Republic’s Jeet Heer, but I’m totally with him on this.

And I’m so old and naive that I thought the same thing. If anything, the idea of being in proximity of another person, especially one for whom a sexual desire exists, would evoke thoughts of anything but masturbation.

There is much us old dinosaurs don’t get about sex these days. Why buxom anime women are a substitute for actual women, for example. Or what one is supposed to do with anal beads.* But we’re not entirely without cultural references.

Then again, Chauncey Gardner was misunderstood, mistakenly assumed to be the master of his own domain.

The days when parents taught their children that such activities led inexorably to blindness and the growth of hair on places where it shouldn’t be are past. But it’s still sound practice to raise one’s offspring with the understanding that this is a practice best done in alone. After all, who wants their little darling to grow up to be Harvey or Louis? Or to date Roy Moore, for that matter.

*No. If I wanted to know, I would watch a Youtube. Do not help.


17 comments on “Short Take: To Watch Or To Be Watched

  1. Mike G.

    …The days when parents taught their children that such activities led inexorably to blindness and the growth of hair on places where it shouldn’t be are past…

    I know right, they don’t make razors to shave the palms of your hands.

  2. Elpey P.

    I could comment on how the issue of consent has quietly snuck out the back door with this story, but I don’t want to be guilty of going off-topic so I will instead suggest “admiring c.k.” as yet another euphemism.

    1. SHG Post author

      Not just consent, but the trauma and PTSD it caused, preventing these survivors from ever leaving home again. What about that, you shitlord, or do you care nothing about that?

      1. Elpey P.

        Of course, I was just on my way to drop off a donation to Survivors of Legal And Consensual Kinkiness Emotional Recovery Services. Hopefully they accept inappropriate Halloween costumes.

  3. B. McLeod

    Times change, obviously. For example, it is evident that law schools did not teach about anal beads when you were in school, but today, at least some of them apparently do. Younger posters assure me that it is simply age and diminishing intelligence that cause me not to understand the increasingly abstract notions of sexuality permeating our society today.

    1. SHG Post author

      Which law schools have a “Law and Anal Beads” course? I’m sure some aspiring lawyers here want to know. And is it an elective?

      1. B. McLeod

        A couple of years ago, Drexel professor Lisa McElroy caused a bit of a stir by emailing all her “Legal Writing” students a link to a video entitled “She Loves Her Anal Beads,” which some have described as “pornographic.” So, apparently at Drexel, you get this in “Legal Writing,” and I’m guessing it is a required course (because when I was in school, it was, though sans anal beads in that day).

          1. B. McLeod

            Hah. A link to an old Tam-Tam story. She was one of their better commenters (along with Elie Mystal and Staci Zaretsky). I don’t get by there much since they killed comments. I hope Instructor Tabo is still doing okay out there, somewhere.

            1. SHG Post author

              Tamara was always a favorite of mine. She wrote for Fault Lines as well for a while. I remember when Staci was fun and funny, before she got all self-righteous. Good times.

              I kept touch with Tamara for a while, but she fell off the face of the earth. I hope she’s doing well too.

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