For many years, regular people would ask a common question: How do I get out of jury duty? My pat response was to explain to them how they, if they were on trial, would sincerely hope for regular people to be willing to sit as jurors so they, if they were on trial, would have a shot at a jury chosen from a cross-section of the community. People didn’t like my answer, because jury duty is intrusive, inconvenient and, well, boring, but they generally accepted the premise. Yeah, sucky as jury duty may be, it’s necessary to get as fair a panel as possible.

But much as they may have loathed this civic “right,” they didn’t sign up to be afraid that someone would beat them or protest outside their home or threaten their children on the way to school. Loathing is part of the gig. Fear is not. Continue reading →

The Washington Post announced that it will not make an endorsement in this, and perhaps future, presidential campaigns. An endorsement of Kamala Harris has already been drafted by the editorial board, but upon demand of the paper’s owner, Amazon billionaire Jeff Bezos, it was killed.

So what?

From those on the left supporting Harris, this was an outrage as if this could thwart Democrats’ winning the election, which remains neck in neck despite the fact that the Harris campaign was far better funded than Trump’s and that Harris was running against Trump, a vulgar, lying, narcissistic ignoramus. Continue reading →

It’s common knowledge that the government uses all kinds of rats to secure convictions. We don’t call them rats in court, however. They’re referred to as CIs, CS, un-indicted co-conspirators, cooperators, “individual number 1,” and the like. Many times, though, they’re referred to by their names. Indictments and 302s include their last names in all caps*, and with a cursory review of the docket, you can get an idea of what they pled to and what they may know about your guy.

The government uses all types of folks looking for an easier way out of the BOP’s spartan accommodations: from the wretched, luckless errand boy who drove someone to one deal, to the top dogs who’ve organized a transnational dope-slinging syndicate. Rationally, the government needs the kingpins, and those closest to them, when trying to collar other cartel leaders. Continue reading →

No one had seen Sheriff Roy Templeton in five days. Folks at the Sheriff’s Department in Mud Lick, Alabama started whispering about the need to do a welfare check on the area’s top cop.

Everyone drew straws to see who would pay the Sheriff a visit. As luck would have it, Chief Deputy Ernesto Miranda drew the assignment. He got in his cruiser and drove to Sheriff Templeton’s residence.

The Chief Deputy announced his presence after two distinct raps to the door. “Police! Welfare check. Anyone home?” A couple of minutes later the door unlocked and Arlene Templeton, the Sheriff’s wife, came to the door with streaked mascara and red-tinged eyes.

“Arlene, what’s wrong? Where’s Sheriff Roy?”

Arlene sniffled a bit. Her lower lip trembled. “Oh Ernesto, he’s really not well,” Arlene managed before bursting into tears. Chief Deputy Miranda didn’t know what else to do, so he hugged Arlene. “I’m sorry Arlene,” he said.

“Sorry for what, Chief Deputy?” Sheriff Roy’s voice rang from a back room. Immediately, Chief Deputy Miranda perked up. “Sheriff?” he asked. “You okay? Everyone at the station’s been wondering about you since Saturday night.”

Sheriff Roy stepped into the living room. What the Chief Deputy saw next nearly struck him dumb.

Sheriff Roy was dressed in an orange and white uniform: white pants with an orange stripe, an orange shirt that read “Sheriff” in white lettering, and a garishly orange badge that looked like it’s been dipped in Pantone 151.

“I’m fine, Chief Deputy. Can we please go to the Sheriff’s Department now? I need to address everyone.”

“Yes sir. Shouldn’t be a problem. You want me to drive, Sheriff?”

“I was hoping you’d offer.”

The two men sat in Miranda’s squad car for a couple of minutes before they drove off. It was the Chief Deputy who broke the silence.

“Interesting outfit you’ve got on there, Sheriff.”

“I’m just attempting to keep up with the kids these days, Miranda. I heard there were certain young men in the Crimson Tide ball team who thought it a fashion statement to paint their nails orange after losing to Tennessee. Seemed like it was time to update my wardrobe.”

“Huh. Do tell now.”

The men drove in silence for several miles.

“This is loss number two for the Tide in Knoxville. Back to back, Miranda. That’s a hell of a feat for a coach who looks like a grown up Bobby Hill.”

“You becoming a Vol fan, Sheriff?”

“Hell no,” the Sheriff chuckled. “I’m giving the new Devil his due.”

Miranda pulled the cruiser into a filling station. “Gotta get gas, Sheriff.”

“At least you’re not doing something as rankly stupid as going for it on 4th and 22, Miranda. Christ almighty, what was DeBoer thinking? You punt and then force a stop. It’s damn near madness to attempt a 4th and 22.”

“Sure is, Sheriff.” Miranda nodded in agreement, attempting to keep the Sheriff talking.

“If there’s one thing that game shows me, it’s DeBoer doesn’t understand what coaching in the SEC is like, Miranda. There’s standards. The standard is the Alabama Crimson Tide. Almost twenty Natties to our name, son. No longer. Now we’re 0-2 against the state of Tennessee.”

Sheriff Roy slapped the dashboard. “Goddamn TENNESSEE, Miranda. Can you believe it? Those orange clad buffoons beat us again. And insult to injury, we lost to their nerdy little relatives in Nashville too.” With that, Sheriff Roy spat.

Chief Deputy Miranda saw none of this as he was inside paying for gas, two Coca-Colas and a bag of Flaming Hot Cheetos.”

When he returned to the cruiser, Miranda heard Sheriff Roy droning on about the Tide’s numerous interceptions, including the game-clincher by Will Brooks of the Vols.

“Son of a bitch was a walk-on from Alabama, Miranda! He’s a local boy and he caught the game-deciding ball as if Milroe meant to throw it to him. Can you believe it?”

“It’s amazing, Sheriff.”

The two made it to the Sheriff’s Department. Chief Deputy Miranda turned off the motor and looked at Sheriff Roy.

“Sir, with all due respect, you show up for work dressed like that and the troops are going to ask questions.”

“What questions could they ask that are more pressing than who should face justice today, Miranda? Maybe we could answer how Kalen DeBoer turned a legacy forged from greatness into a mass of quivering crimson Jello? Did Coach Saban go because he saw his kids painting their nails orange? How did we only hang seven points on the damn Vols in the first half?”

Sheriff Roy was wide-eyed with a feral look. It truly terrified Chief Deputy Miranda.

“No sir, I don’t think I can help answer any of those.”

Sheriff Roy Templeton exhaled, the life and fight seemingly draining from him. “Then the best we can figure is this is a shit day where grown men expect participation trophies to mean something and act accordingly.”

The two men wouldn’t speak of this day ever again, or these conversations. Sheriff Roy returned to wearing his normal uniform the next day, but he would occasionally break out the orange and white Sheriff’s uniform when he was in a bad mood.

And the people of Mud Lick learned very quickly never to cross Sheriff Roy when he wore orange and white.

There are times when the race of a criminal defendant matters, and can be used as an effective argument in his defense. Unfortunately, race can also come off as a ham-handed and offensive cudgel that backfires badly because of a public defender’s ideological blindness, as was the case when a San Bernardino County public defender engaged a prosecutor in plea negotiations on behalf of his Hispanic client.

According to the deputy district attorney’s declaration, when the deputy public defender failed to obtain a better offer, he “exclaimed ‘I really don’t care.’ [The deputy district attorney] proceeded to ask him what he meant by that statement and [he] stated, ‘read between the lines …, I am a white man, what do I care? It’s not my people we are incarcerating.’ [¶] Continue reading →

When New York voters go to the polls, they will see propositions in addition to candidates for elective office. The first of these props will be presented on the ballot as follows.

This proposal would protect against unequal treatment based on ethnicity, national origin, age, disability, and sex, including sexual orientation, gender identity and pregnancy. It also protects against unequal treatment based on reproductive healthcare and autonomy.”

A “YES” vote puts these protections in the New York State Constitution.

A “NO” vote leaves these protections out of the State Constitution.

Continue reading →

In other times, Daniel Penny would likely be celebrated as a hero. There would be a movie about him and children would dress as Penny for Halloween. But not at this time, as Penny stands trial for the killing of Jordan Neely on a New York City subway. As Andrew Fleischman explains, the law in New York leaves Penny exposed to conviction as the law regarding the use of force, and deadly force, makes clear.

Daniel Penny killed Jordan Neely with a chokehold. Some feel that this was not a crime, or that it was so heavily mitigated by the circumstances that we should not treat it as a crime. But it looks like the law applied to the facts is clear. Under New York law you’re not justified using force unless it’s to prevent the imminent unlawful use of force against you or someone else. “Imminent” is an important word here. Somebody who has pulled back their hand to punch you in the face is threatening imminent force.

Continue reading →

Some of you may have noticed that I trash your comments on a post about Harris when your point is that Trump is worse, or a post about Trump when your point is Harris is worse. I appreciate that it’s popular to do so, and most people who agree with you also agree with your comparison. I do not. Nor, apparently, does David French.

If you think the left is uniquely intolerant, how do you process right-wing censorship? Or if you think the right is uniquely prone to political violence, how do you process far-left riots? When faced with similar behavior from one side or the other, hard-core partisans retreat to specious comparisons. They comfort themselves with the idea that no matter how bad their own tribe might be, the other side is worse.

Continue reading →

Is it wrong to offer people who are registered to vote and sign a petition at a Musk rally the chance to a cool mil? Election law prof Rick Hasen says you bet it is.

Hugo Lowell: “Elon Musk says on stage at a town hall that America PAC will be awarding $1 million every day until the election to a registered Pennsylvania voter who has signed his petition. Musk awarded the first $1 million this evening to someone at the town hall, bringing the guy onto the stage and handing him a jumbo check, lotto-style. Musk is essentially incentivizing likely Trump voters in PA to register to vote: Petition is to support for 1A and 2A, so basically R voters. But they also have to be registered to vote, so if they weren’t already, they would do it now.”

Continue reading →

Yikes! It’s already the third Friday in October and I haven’t done anything Halloween-related this year? For shame. You may admonish me at your will, dear readers. I’ll wait.

Now that you’ve gotten that out of your system, let’s talk one of my absolute favorite holidays: Halloween! It’s fun to watch my kids get dressed up and roam the neighborhood with other children in search of the best candy hauls that evening. It’s a fun night where kids and their parents can let loose a little and just have fun while ghouls, ghosts and things that go bump in the night run rampant.

As I am nothing if not helpful and kind, I take great pride in bringing you my updated list of tips, hints and tricks to make your All Hallow’s Eve extra special. Enjoy! Continue reading →