The issue of border searches, limitless in scope and restraint, was justified by our Homeland Security Czar, Michael Chertoff, as vital to protect us from terrorism.  And pornography. And now an SUV cozy?

From the Press Republican,

Keene Valley resident Jerilea Zempel was detained at the U.S. border this summer because she had a drawing of a sport-utility vehicle in her sketchbook.  U.S. Customs and Border Protection officers told Zempel they suspected her of copyright infringement.

She was released after more than an hour in custody at the Houlton, Maine, port of entry from New Brunswick, Canada.  Her release came only after she persuaded border guards she was an artist doing a project that involved a crocheted SUV as a statement against America’s dependence on oil and love for big vehicles.

Now if the border guards detained Zempel for artistic reasons, that might be understandable.  After all, “her submission was an SUV cozy on a rented Hyundai Santa Fe,” certainly a dubious choice of artistic endeavors.  But that wasn’t the problem.  The problem was copyright infringement. 

The problem was that they suspected this woman of trying to sneak across the border with an illicit drawing of a Hyundai.  Had they been on the payroll of the Korean automaker, they could not have been more diligent and concerned with the corporate welfare of this manufacturer of vehicles with lengthy warranties.  And what if she possessed a drawing of a Chevy Tahoe?  Would there have been any chance of talking her way out of it.

The fact that United States border officials detained, DETAINED, a United States citizen for this purpose is beyond shocking.  She posed no immediate threat to the security of the nation.  At absolute worst, she posed a threat to competent illustration, lest she bring down the American automobile drawing industry.  Who in the world informed these border officials that it’s their job to seize Americans who they fear might violate a copyright?

Our border control has long been the subject of grave concern, but for its porous nature when aliens enter without proper authorization as well as seizing the personal property of Americans “just in case.”  Now we add the national threat of SUV cozies to the list of potential harms they protect us against.

There has been no reaction from Czar Chertoff, and why should he?  After all, they did let her go.  Eventually.    This isn’t an institutional problem requiring any thought or involvement by very important government officials, is it?

Of course it’s unimportant.  Until it’s you or yours who gets stopped at the border for copyright infringement.  But then, New Jersey has no international borders, does it Czar Chertoff?  And I don’t even know if anyone in your family can draw.