From Ken Lammers’ sidebar of bizarre prosecutorial tricks comes this important bit of news via the AP :

A federal judge sentenced a Sioux Falls man to probation, a fine and restitution for sending a letter containing animal feces in the mail. Jeffrey Dezeeuw, 45, pleaded guilty to a count of mailing injurious articles.

Prosecutors said he smeared the excrement on a traffic citation, a note and cash that he sent to the Minnehaha County Clerk of Courts on July 21.

Dezeeuw was sentenced to three years of probation, a $500 fine and ordered to pay restitution of $451.

It’s the mail.  It’s a federal offense.  But most importantly, the person who has to open the letter and touch all that yucky stuff is not the cop who gave you the citation.  In other words, no matter how good you think it feels, you’re getting the wrong person.  And before Jdog asks, I do not think the type of animal from which the feces was derived is relevant.

As a corollary, please wash your hands both before and after mailing in your traffic citation.