Some great stories. Some lame. Some funny. Some not funny at all. But whether the stories brought a smile to your face, or catharsis for the teller, it reminds us that we are all boneheads once in a while. Sometimes, the product of our misstep is good for a laugh at our expense, and sometimes we suffer for a lifetime.

One commenter wanted the jacket more than anyone else, and it showed. After consultation with some guy from Wyoming, who strongly urged me never to bother him again with such nonsense, a winner has been chosen.  With deep appreciation and admiration of his literal embrace of the “pic could help” piece of advice, the winner is… Continue reading →

Crossing a state highway patrol officer who had seized my client’s tractor-trailer filled with narcotics at the suppression hearing, he testified to something different than he wrote in his report.  The wheels turned as I carefully framed the question so he couldn’t weasel out of his hole, and closed the trap.  He responded:

Well, I couldn’t put that in the report because the judge wouldn’t like it.

Nailed. I had him.  Caught the cop dead in a lie, and it doesn’t get any better than that.  It was one of those fist pump moments, and I imagined the judge ripping the prosecution a new one for outright lying to the court.  So what happened.

Suppression denied.  Not another word about it. Move along. Continue reading →

There are curmudgeons, and there are people who play curmudgeon on the internet. Under the pseudonym, Otto Sorts, someone is pretending to be a curmudgeon at a marketeering/futurist blog called Attorney At Work.

Otto Sorts has been reading law since before Martindale met Hubbell. Of Counsel at a large corporate firm that prefers to remain anonymous, Otto is a respected attorney and champion of the grand tradition of the law. He is, however, suspicious of “new-fangled” management ideas and anyone who calls the profession the legal “industry.” When he gets really cranky about something he blogs here at Attorney at Work.

At a large firm “that prefers to remain anonymous”?  Perhaps because the firm’s primary office is in Bangalore?  The problem, aside from the ability to use moderately correct English, is that this strikes me as a lie, a phony, where the marketeers have created a fictional old man as a foil to their attempt to convince youngsters to love and appreciate their “new fangled” ways.

I wouldn’t have known about this scam blog but for the ABA Journal’s blog whisperer mentioning a post, where this phony curmudgeon Continue reading →

“After the Court of Appeals threw out the his statements of guilt, we did the best we could with what we had left,” said Assistant District Attorney Christa Book. “I’m sorry that I could not bring Matthew justice.”

The Albany Times-Union called the acquittal “stunning.”  Like beauty, stunning is in the eyes of the beholder.  That Adrian Thomas was retried following the reversal of his conviction by the Court of Appeals is ugly.  That the prosecutor, in the face of the ruling and the defense evidence that Adrian’s son, Matthew, died not from any abuse, but from a bacterial infection, still believed that he committed murder was stunning.

Coffey used testimony from outside medical experts to argue that the baby died of a bacterial infection and not through any action of his father.

Thomas was convicted in 2009 of second-degree murder in the boy’s death, but the state Court of Appeals ordered a new trial earlier this year. The justices, in a 7-0 decision released in February, cited heavy-handed tactics used by Troy investigators, who interrogated Thomas for almost nine hours before he demonstrated how he threw the child.

The acquittal comes nearly six years after 4-month-old Matthew died, and Troy Police Sergeant Adam Mason manipulated a confession out of Thomas because an ER doc mistakenly jumped to the conclusion that the death was caused by abuse.  The defense tried to get the court to allow a false confession expert, Richard Ofshe, to testify, but the court instead went with the prosecution’s “expert,” Paul Cassell, who explained that false confessions don’t really happen. Continue reading →

Philip Datz was a freelance photojournalist, doing what freelance photojournalists are supposed to do.  That annoyed Suffolk Police Sgt. Michael Milton, who did what he wasn’t.

Philip Datz, 37, was covering the aftermath of a police pursuit on June 29, 2011, when Suffolk Police Sgt. Michael Milton approached him and told him not to film the scene. He filmed the encounter with Milton, who ordered him to leave the scene but not without first charging the freelancer with a misdemeanor count of obstruction of governmental administration. Datz was given a desk appearance ticket.

Suffolk County District Attorney Thomas Spota dropped the charges in August 2011.

Datz sued the county, and its taxpayers will now be paying the $200,000 settlement.  It’s important that they feel the pain for Milton’s wanton abuse of authority and deprivation of Datz’s constitutional rights, though it would certainly have meant more if Milton suffered for his choices.  But his punishment was a  loss of 23 days of “accrued time,” ten of which he got back if he didn’t do it again. Continue reading →

Could it be?!?  Is it true?!?  Who cares. This is the greatest contest ever in the history of the interwebz.

First prize is the official Gerry Spence fringed buckskin jacket, modeled here by the lovely SJ spokesmodel, Midday Cowboy.  That’s right, fringes. Buckskin. Gerry Spence. Does it get any better?  I think not.

And how can you win this fabulous prize? Continue reading →

Northwestern law dean Dan Rodriguez has taken the mantle of AALS Head Cheerleader, arguing on the one hand that the Legal Academy “gets it” when it comes to the problems facing law students and new lawyers after having pissed away a ton of money and opportunity on their JD, while simultaneously perpetuating the myth that they can continue doing things as they always have because it makes lawprofs happy.  And anyone who disagrees can shut up.

Let the scamblogging games commence!!
I should have added to above: law faculty with whom I meet are remarkably resilient and positive in the face of the bottomless pit of screed and invective that comes by way of (mostly) anonymous bloggers.

Posted by: dan rodriguez | Jun 9, 2014 9:34:08 AM

But while scambloggers don’t have much of a soapbox these days, Above the Law remains the 800 lb. gorilla (sorry, Elie, but I had to) in the lecture hall.  A debate broke out on Facebook over ATL’s failure to include solos in their law school rankings, and Rodriguez jumped in with such constructive thoughts as Continue reading →

Let’s face it, there are times when the First Amendment just plain sucks.  There is the sort of revenge porn perpetrated by scum like Hunter Moore.  There is the poster boy for protected speech, the Skokie Nazis.  And Tim Cushing at Techdirt raised a new one, the companies that manufacture license plate readers.

Private companies engaging in large-scale surveillance are pushing back against the push back against large-scale surveillance… by filing lawsuits alleging their First Amendment right to photograph license plates is being infringed on by state laws forbidding the use of automatic license plate readers by private companies.

An intrusion on personal privacy on a mass scale never before seen, capturing license plates at a fantastic rate of nearly 1,000 per hour, the companies have amassed a database of about 1.8 billion images. And, aside from some company knowing all about movements, they’re happy to share them with law enforcement. Continue reading →

At the WaPo Conspiracy, insomniac lawprof Orin Kerr posts about an important Second Circuit opinion:

The Second Circuit has handed down a very important new Fourth Amendment case, United States v. Ganias. In an opinion by Judge Chin, the court held that the government violates the Fourth Amendment when it indefinitely retains computer files that were seized pursuant to a search warrant but are not responsive to the warrant.

Orin runs through the government’s “practical” arguments, ranging from the claim that once the government has it, it’s the government’s property, through its need to maintain the integrity of the evidence, whether for future availability or authentification.  And of course, the “no harm, no foul” argument since it later obtained a warrant to search what it had no right to possess.

As Orin does an excellent job addressing the opinion, there’s no need for me to recap as I have nothing worthwhile to add.  So why am I writing about it?  Well, in his sleep-deprived state, Orin goes one toke over the line when he writes: Continue reading →

If you read this post, I’m going to come to your house and beat the living daylights out of you.  Does this scare you?  Probably not, both because you know I won’t do it, and because you know I don’t mean it.  Not because you don’t necessarily deserve a damn good beating, but because there isn’t a chance in the world I could actually do it because anybody in the world has the capability of reading this post, and I wouldn’t have a clue who you are.

So while it’s a putative threat, it’s not a “true threat,” as the categorical exception to the First Amendment would require in order for my threat to be actionable.  But why? Is it because I didn’t really mean it, or because you weren’t really afraid? That’s the question posed in the Elonis case, in which cert was granted by the Supremes.

At Slate, Dahlia Lithwick offers a conflicted view of the case.  Anthony Elonis, regardless of whether his threats were true or not, is a pretty troubled dude, based on the thoughts that flow through his head alone.  He posted “rap lyrics” on Facebook about killing people. He claims it was artistry, because Eminem.  His wife, one of the targets of his artistry, thought otherwise.  It didn’t help that he “artistically” wrote about shooting up a kindergarten class. Continue reading →